11. “Bet my best bottle of bourbon that you’re wrong.”, (Wherein Bucky gets shitfaced drunk for the first time since Hydra, does his best to win a bet, and fucks Steve senseless). SHIELD thinks the Avengers need to learn to work together. He wasn't expecting a marriage proposal. Written for the 25 Days of Christmas OTP Challenge 2015, “Who has been a good little girl and got a Captain America as a new neighbor for Christmas early this year?”. Francine, Courteney Cox played a chef on Friends. Khalida Red thought that landing a job as Steve Rogers, freaking Captain America's PR manager was going to be amazing. Or the one where Steve pretends to be Bucky's boyfriend to get his parents off his case after Bucky finds his ad on Craigslist. -From “Four Little Words.” This is the only appropriate response to give when someone tells you they’re an ethicist. Fury thinks Coulson is the man for the job. Your name is James Buchanan Barnes, or so you were told as you burnt on a crashing wreck of metal.
-From “1600 Candles,” when Hayley has a large pimple on her face, and Roger has no interest in comforting her about it. 8. “Steve, before she tells you your future, let me tell you her past: forty years of alcoholism and three doctorless abortions.” One thing you are certain of is that you are far too old for this shit. Bucky and Tony are not affected one bit, despite the fact that everyone else is confused. )-saramusic credit: Dream a Little Dream of Me - Ella Fitzgerald \u0026 Louis Armstronginspired by you can't kill art: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIXqlfdZSXhlVmd1S0BGq6w -From “Dope And Faith,” as Steve is about to visit a carnival psychic. '5: Dirty dancing and lollipops+1: Steve goes to confession. -From “Rapture’s Delight,” Roger giving his brutally honest take on Christianity. It’s 67 degrees outside, and I hate you.” This tag has not been marked common and can't be filtered on (yet). While we've done our best to make the core functionality of this site accessible without javascript, it will work better with it enabled. "HYDRA's scientists had been delighted to find their serum-reversal procedure had worked. Some days you think maybe that is all you’ll ever be, a burning, crashing wreck of metal and bones and blood. 15. “I hate you. He creates a big insult of Steve's dancing, restoring himself to health. -From “Failure Is Not A Factory Installed Option,” when Steve turns the backyard into a drive-in theater because of all cars Stan has been tricked into buying are all over the yard, which leads a bunch of girls to think Steve and his friends actually have cars. They say 'a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush' but Sam has pretty big hands and he'd prefer the birds to keep their beaks out of his love life, thanks.

I didn’t…I didn’t ask you to…”, “To what Buck?” Steve snapped back, standing up. 13. For the prompt: “Who made you king of the castle?”. Clint introduces Steve to kung-fu movies. There's A) Troll In The Future Series by greenbergsays. Roger Smith of American Dad may be the most brutally honest character on television. It's not like I had anyone to celebrate with." Steve just wanted a job. Bucky stood, his chair skidding back along the wooden floor, and took a swig straight from the bottle by his hand, before sauntering to the stereo, taking the bottle with him. Or: Five times that Steve Rogers was a dirty cocktease and the one time Bucky got the best payback possible.
“God, that’s awful! Some other characters are included. What it says, 5 times Steve Rogers ended up in jail (with and without Bucky) + 1 time all of the Avengers got arrested with him. “This guy’s a douche with a capital bag!” He’s like America: The Guy!” 6. Steve only has 3 human geeky friends that always stand by his side no matter what crazy scenario is going on.

"Nope," Tony crows. What Does It Take To Reopen A Hotel During The Pandemic? Because you did. Steve Rogers is an absolute troll. “I’d even settle for a mother killer without Edward James Olmos cheeks.” Coulson thinks he is not paid enough for this shit. Your first grope-fest. “Stop talking, stop telling me things, just stop! Though Francine returns to being an enabler, but she will let Stan beat him up when he deserves it. "Nooo, no-no-no, nope, you," and he jabs a finger lightly at Steve, "are splitting hairs. 1: Pre-serum Steve seduces Bucky for the first time 2: Steve tests Bucky's restraints while on a mission 3: Nothing good ever happens when they're sitting in a meeting, Bucky has a vibrator up his ass, and Steve's holding the remote 4: 'But you're keeping the outfit, right?' -From “Frannie 911,” severely insulting Steve’s dancing skills. Who’s the father? “Well screw you, I’m Kevin Bacon!” “I even watched that Meg Ryan movie where she played a burn victim.” (Steve tells him that Meg Ryan never played a burn victim) “Oh, Meg, honey….” “I don’t have any. Unfortunately, he than laughs so hard at his own joke that he crashes his car just where the prison bus crashed, and has to escape all over again. Stick around if you're interested! Tastes like beard hair and Sofia sweat.” Character study of Karen Page, Darcy Lewis, and Natasha Romanov. Please consider turning it on! Touching your face all day with your greasy hands?” Months after he woke up on the banks of the Potomac, when a reporter mistakenly assumes Steve would disapprove of homosexuality being as accepted as it is in the modern day, Steve accidentally snaps and unleashes his real opinion on the matter... and with that, a secret he's hidden for over eighty years. “I can envision millions of Americans rising up as one and demanding legislation that would require your legs to be amputated, burned, and buried next to Hitler. “To what? Steve Rogers someone who never bothered to get one: ....no, Bucky let out an inhuman noise, throwing the rope across the room, looking down at Steve angrily. -From “Stan Knows Best,” Roger offering an accidental — but still pretty brutal — slam on Meg Ryan.

“You don’t have any holiday cheer?”“Christmas decorations,” Steve says. Darcy Lewis' terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day takes a turn for the unexpected when she meets her soul mates. -From “Tears Of A Clooney,” Roger is an unusually harsh wine critic. Based off this tumblr post by peterssquill: Some cop, unlucky enough to pull over Captain America of all people: Sir um could I see ur... uh... license? The year is 1944. His arm now settled around Pepper's waist and the other on the arm-chair arm, he leans forward and says, "How many crimes did you commit?". Bucky let out a whine, a tortured yell and pushed Steve up against the wall, breathing heavily. -From “Frannie 911,” severely insulting Steve’s dancing skills. If you couldn’t tell, Roger really has it in for Klaus. He has essentially no filter, saying whatever viciously cruel things pop into his head. “Ah, Steve. HYDRA scientists successfully de-serum Captain America, only to discover that they are utterly unprepared for Steve Rogers. Their jubilation was dampened by the discovery that Steve's smaller self might no longer be Captain America-sized but was still 100% Steve Rogers, and Steve Rogers was now mad enough to spit nails. Or: Steve is kind of a weirdo and Tony really loves him. He would eventually come around, though. -From “It’s Good To Be Queen,” when Steve thinks the Mitch, the pizza delivery guy is Jesus, and Roger is skeptical. tip: buffy gen teen AND "no archive warnings apply", With the support of the community, we've added 2,660 new members this drive. Let’s pay tribute to Roger’s glorious rudeness by looking at 15 of his nastiest insults ever. Steve gets a Twitter account, then an Instagram one, then he gets Bucky back, too. 10. “It’s like Harry Potter, except it causes genocide and bad folk music!” Why did you take me? Minions, Mario, And The Grateful Dead — 2020’s Weirdest Sneaker Collaborations, The Best Bourbon At Every Price Point From $10-$100, MyCover: How Collin Sexton Is Fueled By Those Closest To Him, How Josh Hart Is Turning His Love For Wine Into Industry Reform, Holly Rowe Is Doing It All For ESPN Inside The WNBA Bubble, Talib Kweli & Orlando Jones Talk ‘American Gods’ Firing, MADtv, 7UP, Activism, 2KBaby Gives A Melodic Live Performance Of His New Hit ‘Mad’ For ‘UPROXX Sessions’, ‘Obsessed:’ Celebrating The ‘Vast Ocean’ Of Women In Rap With Blimes And Gab, ‘Who Is NLE Choppa?’ Pulls Back The Curtain On The 17-Year-Old Viral Star, All The Best New Rap Music To Have On Your Radar, All The Best New Hip-Hop Albums Coming Out This Week, All The Best New Indie Music From This Week, All The Best New Pop Music From This Week, All The Best New Music From This Week That You Need To Hear, All The Best New R&B From This Week That You Need To Hear. “I don’t know.”.

-From “Stan’s Best Friend,” when Klaus thinks he could be the family’s pet. You and Steve Rogers share a dance after he returns from a mission with the Howling Commandos.

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